It's been a year since he saved me from all my worries and misery.

I was in our Social Responsibility class a while ago when Ivan called my attention and reminded me of the date today. It is actually the 3rd of August, the date that was supposed to be Jay and I's first anniversary. I KNOW I SHOULDN'T BE BLOGGING ABOUT THIS STUFF AT ALL BECAUSE I HAVE A BOYFRIEND WHO'S BEEN VERY GOOD TO ME AND WHOM I'M TRULY, MADLY, DEEPLY, AND UNCONDITIONALLY IN LOVE WITH.

Buuuttttt...

This is MY blog, my outlet, and this is where I could, if you may, release all my emotional outbursts less the sugarcoating and pretending.

Well, I just couldn't explain how I felt when I was reminded of what the date was, of what was. (Puro was???) Nag-hang ako for a moment there and then I tried to grasp what really was I feeling. I was not happy, I was not sad. I've been thinking all day (though nobody's ever noticed) about things, how it happened, and why August 3 happened yet the anniversary did not.

Don't get me wrong, I am happy with my life now and the decisions I have made which made way for WHAT I AM AND HAVE NOW. Probably I am feeling a little guilt for what I did to him, and to the others. They've all been very very good and loyal to me and I know, I had my share of shortcomings too. Of course I couldn't and wouldn't tell you that I have been bad. I really felt love for those people that I used to exchange I love yous with it's just that, love is not enough to make relationships work. Agree? There is some sort of clash between two people of different DNAs and maturity, drive to make things work, respect, understanding, and the likes are expected from both parties.

Relationships aren't just about being happy together, feeling love, kilig... it is hard work! I have read in some magazine years back that we should choose to be with someone whom we share values and beliefs with.

I beg to disagree. We may never find someone who has the same values, likes, and beliefs like ours. We may find someone whom we share a thing or two in common with, but not totally on all aspects of life. That is why there is such thing as compromise. :) We would always meet people who are exactly and perfectly our opposite and we could also, if we try and want, get along well with them. I believe that love is not equivalent to compatibility.

Love is when you dare to be yourself, you realize that he is so unlike you, you respect him and his views, you meet halfway or sometimes you give way so as to avoid hurting the other, and then you realize that what you have been doing is so hard compared to being with someone who is almost like you, but in the end you just smile and say; "It's all worth it.".

I never intended to hurt anyone and if I did, I AM SORRY (from the bottom-rock part of my <3). Someday you'll learn that I had a point and my reasons were not excuses but reasons, really. You might even thank me for giving way to your soon-to-be great love. AYIHEEEE!!!! BOOMBOOMPOW!!! :)